House-cleaning: a guide to getting out of doing them

I'm writing this as part of an interview assignment for a part-time
Freelance Writer position in Vancouver. I can only hope that this
pushes me past the hundred or so applicants. The topic assigned was
"house-cleaning" so here it goes.

I know this is one topic that most guys will agree is in their top 10
of most hated chores around the house. If I can afford it, I will pay
someone to come and do it for me every week, topless if they need to.
Seriously though, I just don't like house-cleaning.

I don't mind taking out the garbage on Tuesdays or doing the dishes
after every meal. Mowing the lawn is also not bad and doing a deep
clean of the carpet is tolerable. I don't even mind folding clothes
out of the dryer. This is especially time-consuming because of all the
little-people-clothings we have to fold. I just don't like
house-cleaning however.

Here are some excuses (most are valid) that I use to get out of doing
house-cleaning.
1) Bring work home. If you say you are part of a big project that has
dire consequences if not addressed, it usually gets you a pass at
house-cleaning;
2) Massive headache. Say that you are unable to do any work because of
a migraine. Use excuse #1 as the cause for not getting enough sleep
and thus, the pounding headaches;
3) Schedule day programs at YMCA so that weekend days are kept busy
with activities for kids. Your kids development is far more important
than doing sweaty house work;
4) Take her out shopping at the malls or outlets. This only works if
she can be bribed with a new pair of shoes or dress.

This is a collection of excuses that have worked for me in the past.
Putting this out there probably reduces my chance (and yours) of ever
using any of these but my gut feeling is that deep-down, we want to
help our partners with this chore. I personally would rather hire
someone to help do this work but until I bring in millions from
blogging, I'll gladly step in and help out.

What are your list of excuses for getting out of house-cleaning?

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